Safety and authority are two of the most important issues in any Washington parenting case. Parents often worry about whether the court will limit time, require supervision, or give one parent more control over school or medical decisions. These questions are stressful, and they can shape the entire direction of a case.
Washington uses RCW 26.09.191 to guide judges when there are concerns about domestic violence, substance abuse, child abuse, or behaviors that create risk for the child. Some restrictions are mandatory if certain findings are made. Others are discretionary and depend on what the judge believes is necessary to protect the child. Understanding how these restrictions work, what proof the court needs, and how parents can rebuild time helps families move forward with clarity.
Decision-making authority matters just as much. Parents need clear guidance on who chooses schools, medical providers, therapy, and activities. Washington courts expect parents to share major decisions unless communication is too difficult or unsafe. When a parenting plan has strong decision-making rules, it prevents conflict and keeps children from being caught in the middle.
This hub explains how restrictions work, how parents can address safety concerns, and how decision-making authority is assigned and enforced in Washington parenting plans.
➡ For more general information about child custody visit Child Custody and Father’s Rights in Washington
Myths and Misconceptions about Decision Making and 191 Restrictions
Myth: “Joint decision-making means 50/50 custody.”
Not true. Decision-making is about major choices (school, healthcare, religion). Residential time is separate. Parents can share decision-making even when one home is primary.
Myth: “If my ex is difficult, I can ask for sole decision-making.”
Sole decision-making is not granted based on conflict alone. Courts look at actual cooperation history, not frustration or personality differences.
Myth: “A 191 restriction applies anytime the other parent is ‘toxic.’”
No. RCW 26.09.191 applies only when there is a court-recognized issue like domestic violence, child abuse, substance abuse, or a demonstrated history of interference—not just bad behavior or disrespect.
Myth: “If the other parent has a DUI, they automatically lose custody.”
A DUI does not automatically trigger a 191 restriction. Courts look at patterns, recency, treatment, and whether the substance use affects parenting ability.
Myth: “Sole decision-making gives me the right to withhold information.”
False. Even with sole decision-making, both parents typically have equal access to school and medical information unless the plan specifically restricts it.
Myth: “If we can’t agree on anything, the court will always choose one parent.”
Sometimes courts assign tie-breakers or split decision-making authority by category. They do not always give all authority to one parent.
Myth: “A parenting plan can prevent a parent from having any contact if there’s a 191 restriction.”
A 191 restriction limits residential time or decision-making, but complete cut-off is rare and usually tied to significant, proven safety risks.
Understanding “Custodial Parent” in Washington
What does “custodial parent” mean in Washington?
Washington does not use the term “custodial parent” in its parenting laws. Instead, the parenting plan identifies decision making authority (legal custody) and the primary residential parent (physical custody). The term “custodial parent” helps align Washington orders with federal law and with states that still use “custody,” but it does not give the primary parent extra legal power.
Does being the primary residential parent give me more authority?
No. Residential time and decision-making are separate issues in Washington. A parent may be the primary residential parent but still share all major decisions with the other parent unless the court specifically assigns sole authority (RCW 26.09.184).
➡ Learn more about residential time at Residential Schedules in Washington Parenting Plans
Is the “custodial parent” the parent who makes decisions?
Not in Washington. Decision-making is its own section of the parenting plan and can be joint or sole regardless of where the child lives. Being the primary residential parent does not automatically grant decision-making rights.
Do Washington schools or federal agencies need a “custodial parent” listed?
Sometimes. Schools, medical offices, and federal agencies (such as for taxes or passport rules) may use the term “custodial parent” because it is standard nationally. In those contexts, the “custodial parent” usually means the primary residential parent, but it does not change rights under Washington law.
Can both parents be considered custodial parents?
Strictly speaking, no because federal law requires a designation. But because the designation of a “custodial parent” has no bearing on the rights and obligations of parents under a Washington State Parenting Plan, both parents are often considered to have joint custody and share all custodial rights.
Should I fight to be named the custodial parent?
In Washington, the title itself does not give extra rights. What matters is the parenting plan: residential time, decision-making, communication, and stability for the child. Courts look at the child’s needs, not labels.
➡ Learn more about residential time at Residential Schedules in Washington Parenting Plans
Understanding RCW 26.09.191 Restrictions
What is a “191 restriction” in a Washington parenting plan, and when does it apply?
A 191 restriction limits a parent’s residential time or decision-making when there is domestic violence, child abuse, substance abuse, or other serious safety concerns. These restrictions come from RCW 26.09.191, and courts must apply them when certain risks are present.
What behaviors trigger mandatory restrictions on parenting time under RCW 26.09.191?
Mandatory restrictions apply when there is a history of domestic violence, child abuse, sexual assault, or other conduct that risks harm to the child (RCW 26.09.191(1) and (2)).
Are allegations enough for supervised visits, or does the court require proof?
Allegations alone are not enough. Courts need evidence that shows the child is at risk before ordering supervised visits, and judges often look for reports, records, or testimony that supports the concern.
What is the difference between mandatory and discretionary restrictions?
Mandatory restrictions apply when certain findings are made under the statute. Discretionary restrictions apply when the court believes limits are necessary to protect the child, even if mandatory factors are not proven (RCW 26.09.191(3)).
Can CPS involvement, police reports, or protection orders affect parenting time?
Yes. CPS findings, pending investigations, police reports, or past protection orders can influence whether the court imposes restrictions. Courts consider the safety of the child first.
How do Washington courts evaluate credibility when parents tell conflicting stories?
Courts compare testimony with objective evidence, credibility, past behavior, CPS involvement, and the child’s needs. Judges have discretion to weigh the facts and decide what is reliable (In re Marriage of Chandola, 180 Wn.2d 632 (2014)).
Evidence, Safety Concerns, and Proof Required
Can a court order supervised visitation, and what evidence does the judge need?
Courts may order supervised time when there is evidence of substance abuse, violence, neglect, or behaviors that put the child at risk. Evidence may include police reports, CPS records, treatment records, or credible testimony.
Can a parent refuse visits if they believe the child is unsafe?
A parent should not unilaterally refuse visits unless the child is in immediate danger. Courts expect parents to follow the parenting plan and seek emergency orders if safety is a concern.
Can a parent stop visits if a child refuses to go?
Not without a court order. Parents must encourage contact and follow the plan unless the child faces an immediate risk. If refusal continues, the parent should seek court guidance. In re Marriage of Rideout, 77 P. 3d 1174 (2003).
What happens when both parents accuse each other of abuse or unsafe behavior?
Courts assess the evidence, credibility, and safety concerns on both sides. Judges may order evaluations, investigations, or temporary restrictions while determining what is safest for the child.
Guardian ad Litem (GAL) in Child Custody Cases
What is a Guardian ad Litem (GAL) in a Washington parenting case?
A Guardian ad Litem is a neutral professional appointed by the court to investigate the child’s circumstances and make recommendations about what arrangement best meets the child’s needs. The GAL represents the child’s best interests, not either parent.
When will a court appoint a GAL?
Courts appoint GALs when there are safety concerns, conflicting allegations, or high-conflict situations that require more information than the court can gather on its own (RCW 26.12.175).
Does the GAL decide custody or make recommendations?
A GAL does not decide the parenting plan. The GAL gathers information and provides a written report with recommendations, and the judge decides whether to adopt those recommendations.
Does the GAL interview children, parents, or both?
Yes. The GAL typically interviews both parents, the child if appropriate, and other involved adults such as teachers, doctors, or caregivers to understand the child’s circumstances.
What evidence does the GAL consider when making recommendations?
GALs review a wide range of information, including interviews, school and medical records, CPS records, and any other evidence that helps them assess the child’s safety and developmental needs.
How much weight do judges give to a GAL report in Washington?
Courts give considerable weight to GAL recommendations because a GAL serves as an “arm of the court” and is afforded quasi-judicial status (Reddy v. Karr, 102 Wn. App. 742, 744 (2000)). The judge still makes the final decision.
Can a GAL recommend supervised visits?
Yes. When a GAL believes the child may face risk during unsupervised time, they may recommend supervised visitation, treatment, evaluations, or other safety measures.
Can a parent challenge or remove a GAL if they believe the GAL is biased?
A parent may file a motion to remove or replace a GAL by showing actual bias, conflict of interest, or a failure to perform required duties. The judge decides whether removal is justified.
Does a GAL affect decision-making authority as well as residential time?
Yes. A GAL may recommend limiting or assigning decision-making authority if the child’s safety, emotional needs, or the parents’ conflict level requires it.
Removing Restrictions and Rebuilding Parenting Time
How do I get supervised visits removed in Washington?
A parent can request unsupervised time after complying with any conditions in the parenting plan. This may include completing treatment, maintaining sobriety, or demonstrating consistent safe behavior. Courts require evidence that the risk has been addressed before removing supervision (RCW 26.09.260).
➡ [link: Modifying Parenting Plans]
How do I regain parenting time after substance abuse or domestic violence allegations?
A parent usually needs documented progress, treatment completion, clean tests, or professional evaluations. The exact thing you must do is likely in the parenting plan itself. Courts look for stability and sustained change before increasing residential time (RCW 26.09.260).
➡ [link: Modifying Parenting Plans]
Can restrictions be lifted later if circumstances improve?
Yes. Restrictions can be reduced or removed when a parent proves a substantial change in circumstances and shows that increased time is safe for the child (RCW 26.09.260).
Do RCW 26.09.191 restrictions affect decision-making authority as well as residential time?
Yes. Safety concerns often limit both residential time and major decision-making authority because the court must protect the child’s best interests (RCW 26.09.191(1)).
How Decision-Making Works
What is the difference between major decisions and day-to-day decisions?
Major decisions involve school, major medical care, and significant activities. Day-to-day decisions involve routines, meals, and normal parenting choices during each parent’s time (RCW 26.09.184(4)).
Is joint decision-making the default in Washington?
Yes. Courts start from the expectation that parents can share major decisions unless conflict or safety concerns make cooperation unsafe or unrealistic (RCW 26.09.187).
When will the court give one parent sole decision-making authority?
Courts award sole authority when there is a history of domestic violence, ongoing conflict, or an inability to cooperate (RCW 26.09.191).
Can joint decision-making work in high-conflict cases?
Only if parents can reliably communicate. If high conflict continues, the court may modify the plan and assign sole authority.
➡ [link: Modifying Parenting Plans]
What happens when parents with joint decision-making cannot agree?
Parents must follow the parenting plan’s dispute-resolution process. If that fails, the court may decide the issue (RCW 26.09.184).
Does sole decision-making mean the other parent has no rights?
No. The other parent still has residential time and access to information unless restricted by the court.
Can decision-making authority be changed later?
Yes. A parent may request modification if cooperation breaks down or safety concerns arise (RCW 26.09.260).
➡ [link: Modifying Parenting Plans]
Does having primary residence give a parent more decision-making power?
Not for major decisions unless that is also part of the parenting plan. The primary residential parent will naturally make more day-to-day decisions like what the child wears, eats, or does during the day.
Major Decisions: School, Medicine, Religion
Who decides school enrollment if parents with joint decision-making cannot agree?
Parents must follow the dispute-resolution process in the plan. If they still cannot agree, the court may decide based on the child’s best interests (RCW 26.09.187).
➡ [link: Enforcement and contempt]
Do routine medical decisions require joint agreement?
Routine medical care is a day-to-day decision for the parent caring for the child at the time. This would include things like well checks and dental cleaning. Major treatments typically require joint agreement, these include things like surgeries and braces (RCW 26.09.184(4)).
Can a parent make emergency medical decisions without the other parent?
Yes. Emergency decisions do not require joint approval. But the other parent should be informed of any emergency promptly.
How do courts handle disagreements about counseling, therapy, or mental health treatment?
If parents disagree about therapy, the court may assign decision-making or require a neutral professional to recommend treatment (RCW 26.09.184).
How do courts handle disagreements about extracurricular activities?
Extracurricular activities can be a source of contention because it almost always affects the other parent’s time with the children. The reality is that while these are not a major decision, you cannot force the other parent to take the child to practice or games during their time without agreement. And that can build resentment for everyone involved. Many parenting plans will address extra curricular activities as part of the other orders section at the end of the parenting plan.
New Partners and Stepparents
Does a parent’s new partner influence decision-making authority?
Only the child’s parents have the authority granted to them. Of course, a new partner will influence the decision maker. And step-parents and new partners are often a source of contention and parents should be sensitive to potential issues when introducing their new significant other into the parenting dynamic to avoid costly court battles.
What role does a stepparent play in school or medical decisions?
Stepparents may help with logistics but cannot make major decisions unless both parents agree.
Can a stepparent attend school meetings or medical appointments?
Yes, with a parent’s permission or when allowed by school or medical policies. But the stepparent should not be steering the conversation or the decisions with the school or doctor. And parents who bring a new significant other must assert their own authority when it comes to their children.
Making the Right Choice for Your Child
When parents disagree about safety or decision-making, the parenting plan must give clear answers. RCW 26.09.191 restrictions help protect children when serious concerns exist, and they give parents a structured path to rebuild time if circumstances improve. Decision-making rules guide school choices, medical care, therapy, and activities so parents know who has the authority to act and how to resolve disagreements.
The goal of any parenting plan is stability for the child and clarity for the parents. When safety issues are handled directly and decision-making authority is clearly defined, conflict decreases and communication improves. Understanding these rules also helps parents avoid mistakes that could lead to unnecessary court involvement.
Reviewed by Attorney Zachary C Ashby, Pacific Northwest Family Law, November 2025.