Parenting Plan Enforcement and Contempt

Solutions for When Parents Don’t Follow the Parenting Plan

Parenting plans work well when both parents follow them. But when one parent ignores the schedule, blocks communication, or refuses to share information, even simple disagreements can escalate quickly. Washington courts understand that missed visits, late returns, and repeated interference take a toll on children and create unnecessary conflict for parents.

Enforcement and contempt are the tools the court uses to restore stability. Enforcement focuses on fixing the problem and getting your time back. Contempt is a formal finding that a parent has willfully violated the plan. Judges prefer not to punish parents, but they will step in when a parent refuses to follow court orders and the disruption becomes harmful to the child.

This page explains the most common questions Washington parents have about enforcing a parenting plan, dealing with violations, understanding contempt, avoiding mistakes that can hurt your case, and knowing when it is time to return to court. You will also learn about makeup time, attorney fees, penalties, dispute resolution, and what happens when violations keep happening.

➡ For more general information about child custody, see our page Child Custody and Father’s Rights in Washington

Myths & Misconceptions About Enforcement and Contempt in Washington

Myth: “If the child refuses to go, it is not contempt.”

Not true. A child’s refusal does not excuse a parent from following the plan. Courts expect parents to encourage exchanges unless there is a legitimate safety issue.

Myth: “Police can force the other parent to hand over the child.”

They rarely intervene in parenting plan disputes. Police will usually tell you to return to court. Filing the right enforcement motion is far more effective.

Myth: “One missed visit is contempt.”

Not always. Judges look for willful violations. An isolated mistake may lead to enforcement or makeup time but not contempt unless the behavior becomes a pattern.

Myth: “If the other parent blocks my calls, that is automatic contempt.”

It depends. Communication interference is contempt only if the parenting plan contains clear communication rules. An attorney can help you decide whether to enforce, modify, or clarify the plan.

Myth: “Contempt will automatically change custody.”

No. Even two contempt findings only create a legal basis to request modification. The judge must still determine whether a major change is in the child’s best interests.

Myth: “I can skip the dispute resolution steps if the other parent is being difficult.”

Skipping Section 7 without a true emergency can backfire. Courts expect parents to follow the plan. Speaking with a lawyer before acting protects you from unintended consequences.

Myth: “If the other parent will not cooperate, the judge will jail them.”

Jail is rare and used only for serious, repeated violations. Courts prefer makeup time, counseling, or financial sanctions first.

Myth: “Contempt is the fastest way to fix the problem.”

Not always. Sometimes negotiation, clarification, or a minor modification resolves the issue faster and with less cost. A lawyer can help you decide the most effective route.

Myth: “I can handle contempt motions myself.”

Contempt rules are technical. Incorrect filings or missing steps can delay your case or weaken your position. Talking with an attorney helps you avoid critical mistakes.

Understanding Enforcement and Contempt

What does “contempt of court” mean in a parenting plan case?

Contempt means a parent has intentionally violated a court order. In parenting plan cases, this usually involves refusing residential time, blocking communication, or ignoring other required terms. A judge may order makeup time, attorney fees, or other sanctions to fix the violation (RCW 26.09.160).

What is the difference between enforcing a parenting plan and holding a parent in contempt?

Enforcement focuses on solving the problem, such as providing makeup time or clarifying unclear parts of the plan. Contempt is a finding that a parent willfully violated the order. Contempt carries penalties while enforcement can simply restore what was missed (RCW 26.09.160).

How much does a motion for contempt for violating a parenting plan cost?

This largely depends on the nature of the violation and cooperation. At Pacific Northwest Family Law, we can sometimes work with the other side to avoid contempt. But when we can’t we have seen a range in costs of between $3,000 to $8,000 for the contempt motion. Cases involving repeated violations, police involvement, or urgent circumstances tend to be more expensive because they require more declarations, evidence gathering, and court time.

Can attorney fees be awarded as part of the finding of contempt?

Not only can attorney fees be awarded, reasonable attorney fees are mandatory to make you whole if you are the innocent party. However, the amount that you may feel is reasonable may be different from what the court believes is reasonable. That means it may not be the entire cost of bringing contempt. That’s just one more reason why trying to find a solution outside of court is a good idea.

When can a Washington court enforce a parenting plan?

A court can enforce a parenting plan whenever a parent violates it, whether by withholding the child, failing to return the child on time, or ignoring other written requirements. The violation must be willful, not accidental or caused by a genuine emergency.

What happens if the child refuses to go to the other parent’s home?

A child’s refusal does not automatically excuse a parent from following the plan. Courts expect parents to encourage contact unless there is a safety concern. A parent who repeatedly allows refusal may face enforcement or contempt, and the court may investigate the cause of the resistance before changing anything. In re Marriage of Rideout, 150 Wash.2d 337 (2003).

What if a parent relocates without notice or violates the relocation law?

Moving without proper notice is a violation of the parenting plan. A judge can order the child returned, impose sanctions, or restrict the relocating parent’s time depending on the severity of the violation.

➡ Learn more at Relocation with Children 

Can repeated violations lead to a change in custody or a modification of the parenting plan?

Yes. Two or more contempt findings within three years can meet the legal standard for modifying the parenting plan. Even then, the judge must still decide whether changing the residential schedule is in the child’s best interests (RCW 26.09.260(2)(d)).

➡ Learn more at Modifying Parenting Plans

When a Parent Will Not Follow the Parenting Plan

What can I do if the other parent will not let me see my child?

If you have a parenting plan that orders residential time, you can file a motion for contempt to recover that time. If you haven’t yet established a parenting plan in the court, you must file a petition for a parenting plan. Either way, the courts can restore time with your child if you are otherwise a fit parent. Time is of the essence in either case because you can lose your rights to see your child if you do not take action.

What if the other parent is always late or frequently changes the schedule?

Courts read the parenting plan strictly. Regular disregard for a parenting plan could be grounds for contempt. But often parents will use words like always or frequently when they are frustrated by recent or past behavior. Chronic lateness or repeated schedule changes may support a contempt motion, especially if the child’s routine is being disrupted. But it may be an opportunity to talk to the other parent about expectations when it comes to communication. If lateness is a problem, it is also a good idea to keep a record. This will improve credibility and help you quantify the frequency of being late.

Can I call the police if the other parent refuses to return the child?

Police rarely get involved in parenting plan enforcement and calling the police for failure to return a child will cause you a great deal of frustration. And if you don’t have a parenting plan at all, they will not help you ever. The Court, on the other hand, will help you. And with the guidance of an experienced family law attorney like those at Pacific Northwest Family Law, you can get things going very quickly.

What if the other parent monitors or interferes with phone or video calls?

Washington State does not have a statewide rule guaranteeing daily calls. But the courts do expect parents to act in a way to foster the relationship between children and parents. A parent should not monitor or block contact unless the parenting plan allows supervision for safety reasons. Repeated interference may justify enforcement or contempt, especially when the plan includes communication rules. But if it is more annoying that a direct violation of the parenting plan, you may need to follow the dispute resolution process as outlined in your parenting plan.

➡Learn more at Parenting Plan Rules, Communication, and Other Provisions

What if the other parent refuses to share school or medical information?

Most parents have equal rights to key educational and medical information. Refusing to share can violate the plan and may lead to enforcement or a clarified communication order. But as long as your parenting plan does not prohibit you from doing so, you can talk to the school or medical provider yourself to obtain the information without the other parent’s involvement.

➡ Learn more at Creating a Parenting Plan

Enforcement Solutions Without Filing Contempt

Do I have to try mediation before filing for contempt?

This depends on the local rules and the severity of the parenting plan violation. An attorney would be able to help you determine the right approach. But the more severe a violation, it usually means it is less likely you need to engage in the dispute resolution process. On the other hand, the local rules in some Washington counties will still direct you to the dispute resolution process before filing for contempt.

It is also a good idea to attempt to address missed time or other parenting plan violations without resorting to court action. If you can document good faith attempts to find a mutually agreeable resolution without success, that can further inform the court as to the willingness of the other party to follow the parenting plan. But you might also be able to save yourself some time and money.

➡ Learn more at Parenting Plan Dispute Resolution

What if the other parent refuses to participate in dispute resolution?

If a parent refuses mediation or another required step, you should document the refusal carefully. You can sometimes do so with a text message or email, or if the other parent is completely nonresponsive to the request. Refusal to participate in the dispute resolution process could also constitute a separate reason for contempt because the dispute resolution process is part of the parenting plan.

Can a Parenting Coordinator help address ongoing enforcement problems?

A Parenting Coordinator can help resolve day-to-day issues and reduce conflict. They cannot change the parenting plan, but they can help interpret unclear terms and document patterns of noncompliance for court review.

Contempt Proceedings: Process and Consequences

How do I file a contempt motion for violating a parenting plan?

Your motion will be supported by declarations and any documented evidence you might have. You first will take this and ask for what is called a Show Cause Order or an Order to Go To Court at an ex parte proceeding. Ex parte means you are doing so in an uncontested forum, so any order will be based solely on your word.

This Order to Go To Court sets a date and a requirement for the other party to come to court and prove why they should not be held in contempt. You must have this order personally served on the other party as soon as possible.

What happens at a contempt hearing in Washington?

The judge reviews evidence, hears from both parents, and decides whether the violation was intentional. If contempt is found, the court orders remedies designed to correct the problem, compensate for losses, or prevent future violations.

What penalties can the court order in a contempt case?

Judges can order makeup time, attorney fees, fines, community service, or mandatory counseling. In serious situations, the court may restrict future make-up time or impose other sanctions under RCW 7.21. It is even possible for the court to order jail time for especially grievous, repeated violations of Court orders to compel compliance. Be aware that if jail time is on the table, then the other party can ask for an attorney at public expense. Jail time is rarely ordered as part of a contempt hearing.

Can a parent go to jail for violating a parenting plan?

Jail is rare and typically used only for severe, repeated violations. It is also only to compel compliance and not as a punishment itself. A parent will usually receive multiple opportunities to comply before incarceration is considered (RCW 7.21.030). They will also have a right to representation by an attorney at public expense.

Can the court order makeup residential time after a violation?

Yes. When time is wrongfully denied, the court does order makeup time that is roughly equal in amount and similar in character to the missed visit, unless doing so would harm the child (RCW 26.09.160(2)(b)).

➡ Learn more at Modifying Parenting Plans

Taking Action When the Parenting Plan Breaks Down

Most parents follow their parenting plan, even if they disagree with parts of it. But when violations become intentional or repeated, the court has the authority to step in, restore lost time, and enforce the boundaries that keep families stable. You do not have to tolerate chronic lateness, blocked calls, withheld visits, or refusal to share important information. These are not “minor issues.” They are violations of a court order.

If you are dealing with repeated problems, you have options. You can request makeup time, file for enforcement, ask the court to hold the other parent in contempt, or in some cases seek a modification of the parenting plan. If you are facing accusations of contempt, you also need to act quickly so the situation does not escalate.

The attorneys at Pacific Northwest Family Law help parents resolve these issues efficiently and respectfully while protecting their time with their children. When the parenting plan stops working, the law gives you a path to get back on track.

 

Reviewed by Attorney Zachary C Ashby, Pacific Northwest Family Law, November 2025.